


Hyacinths are in bloom this time of the year...

by SoraHinari



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! VRAINS
Genre: Angst and Feels, Character Death, Hanahaki Disease, M/M, One Shot, Post-Canon, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-19
Updated: 2019-09-19
Packaged: 2020-10-21 12:04:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20693228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoraHinari/pseuds/SoraHinari
Summary: Maybe it was his voice that day saying his name out loud, maybe it was the card he trusted him with... maybe the long lost feelings he had since the start put placed aside so everyone could be happy and not cause any more issues among them. Yusaku didn't know... he barely understood himself... but even though he grew tired of seeing those white, blue and purple petals... they reminded him of that man in his daydreams... and they brought not only his demise... but a smile upon his face.(Practically Yusaku thinking all kind of stupid things and being an angst filled boi).





	Hyacinths are in bloom this time of the year...

**Author's Note:**

> I have no idea why... but episode 119 had me full with angst and tears sooo have this... .w. excuse any sorry ass mistakes.

Days passed, everything was calm now.

Takeru left to go back to his hometown, not before promising with a grin that he would call and visit as much as he could, Yusaku was sure about that.

Aoi and Akira sealed VRAINS away for good... for now that is. He heard they were working on something more safe for a dueling simulation much like VRAINS, even getting some help from the previous Knights of Hanoi, Spectre, Faust, Gerome and Baira.

Miyu was recovering and along with Jin they were making great progress thanks to Kusanagi-san, he hadn't been able to see them or go work at that matter but he was learning how they were doing almost on daily basis.

Yusaku himself was doing better even, he was more at peace with himself and what he had done, knowing that Ai wanted this as well and... knowing also that he couldn't really handle a life trapped in a network, simply as data... not when he finally found some... friends. Even Spectre, who woke up and went into a fit on how Ryoken left them like that but latter was happy that his boss decided to finally do something for himself, yes even Spectre was now casually waving at him, talking to him... making what well he himself considers jokes at what Yusaku leaves at least a smile to not offend him...

But as for his 'boss'... Ryoken Kogami was nowhere to be found in this. The last news Yusaku had from the other duelist was that fateful night. The night that he had gotten from the guy that saved him so many years ago a card to help him fulfill his role. Yusaku could still remember that night... it was around the same time as it was now that he was just laying on his bed looking at his chipping ceiling, the breeze from the night air next to the sea brushing on his cheeks and it was loud next to his ears but it decided to do a pause when Ryoken called him by his name, 'Fujiki Yusaku'. It was their own way of saying, enough is enough, their own way of saying, this is it, this is reality, this is who we are. Their call to each other that now visual walls and shields dropped. It was no more 'Revolver' and 'Playmaker, no more nicknames to hide themselves behind, no titles as 'The Leader of Hanoi' and no 'Good Guy' and 'Bad Guy' nonsense... right then and there... as the yacht surfed the water towards the horizon, they were just them, just Ryoken and Yusaku.

He could hear it even now, even as he closed his eyes in hope that sleep would take him. That heavy clear voice not even obstructed by the wind itself... it made a shiver run down his spine, chills to form down his body. Ryoken's voice always had an impact on him, but the fact that he was now able to compare his childhood memories to his newfound ones was something priceless to Yusaku. Smiling at the silent replay of his name being called by that voice he had lived searching for, Yusaku suddenly felt a pain, a piercing pain surging through his chest, his lungs, up to his throat. He started coughing, pools of jade wide open now, his body doubled up in pain, his hands holding his throat and chest, rubbing up and down in both areas trying to ease down the cough or at least the rough feeling inside. 

Soon the cough died down to simple jumps of his body, it was just a cold, just the flu, that was what he wanted to think at the moment, he didn't want to bother his mind with more than what he was already concerned with. For someone else something such as; Where is Ryoken? Is he okay? Did he find what he is searching for?, are not important questions, but for Yusaku... he could swear his own life depended on those answers.

His body softly curled up under a blanket, he knew better than to leave himself out in the open without warmth, the blanket was thin but offered some warmth that was better than nothing, especially now that he had a cold. Those two green eyes closed again, tighter this time, trying not to think of the other duelist, trying for a dreamless sleep as his arms clutched his forearms in a self-made hug that his lips would never voice the need for.

* * *

That simple cold never left Yusaku alone, days that he said himself that it would last, became weeks... he was in the middle of his second week, having coughing fits in the middle of the day now, not only just before he slept and just after he woke up like the first days. It became worse, day after day, the pain was everywhere, he now felt it everywhere on his body, every single time his legs started giving out on him, he had found himself kneeling down, holding on his bed for a chance to breath multiple times throughout the day.

At the end of the second week, he had one of the worst coughing fits. He was scrolling through his phone and saw some pictures of him and Ryoken... well... Revolver, probably taken by those stupid paparazzi back in VRAINS. But he couldn't help it, he saved them in a folder and stared at them for some minutes, how on some of them Revolver's lips behind the visor could be seen turning up in a small smile... it made him have butterflies in his stomach, but also have a very heavy cough. It started welling up from his chest as always, burning him from inside out, giving him the feeling he was stabbed, climbing up to his throat making it feel dry... but this time he felt one thing different, he was suffocating, he felt like he was about to cough but no reaction from his body was coming out.

His hands wrapped around his neck, pressuring his Adam's apple to move, to let the air out, to help him cough in order to breath again. No matter how hard he pressed it was like something was stuck at his esophagus, like something was blocking him from even letting that painful cough out. His eyes watered from the whole pain his body was undergoing at that moment, he had shivers all over, little spasms on his legs... but finally while holding his stomach and giving a strong press with his palms there the cough came out, besides air Yusaku felt like something out came out of his mouth, making a mess of his bed sheet. Thinking it was blood he rose his head to see the red liquid splattered all over the white sheet... but what he saw was something out of a fairy tale... or a horror story.

There were blue, white and purple flowers, little delicate flowers. With shaking hands he slowly picked up one and looked at it carefully, he remembered seeing something like that in one of Spectre's books... therefore, even if he was shocked still, he picked up his phone, opened his messages and typed in the little chat he had with Spectre.

_Yusaku: 'Spectre... I need your help with something' _It didn't take that long for the other to answer, after all it was about 5pm.

_Spectre: 'If I can be of assistance I will be... tell me what is troubling you?'_

_Yusaku: 'Can you identify this flower for me?' _ This message came with the image of the three different colored flowers attached to it.

_Spectre: 'That my dear Fujiki-kun is a hyacinth. How come? Want to learn more about flowers?'_

_Yusaku: 'Just... Just this specific one...'_

_Spectre: 'Well it is a flower usually found in eastern Mediterranean areas, they are a bulb flower that belongs to the category and family of Scilloideae. It was named after a Greek mythological hero Hyacinthus. They also are one of the flowers that, in what we call the Flower Language, has several meanings depending on the color of it!' _After reading the information provided to him, Yusaku was inclined to learn more... so he answered after a small pause.

_Yusaku: 'Please go on... can you tell me the meanings of the colors I sent you?'_

_Spectre: 'But of course... here wait a minute to find my book!' _ indeed after some minutes probably three or four Spectre continued typing _'The blue one usually means loyalty to someone and sincerity, the white one means loving and caring emotions towards a person and the purple one symbolizes guild and regret for something left unsaid or undone. Is that all?'_

_Yusaku: 'Yes... Yes that would be all thank you Spectre.'_

After the informative text messaging session Yusaku had with Spectre he sat down and turned on his computer. Opening a search engine he remembered hearing in old tales that there was a disease that caused you to cough up flowers... his mind was blanking out on him for the name but he quickly typed down flower coughing and by pressing search he found it. Opening a page he started reading everything about it, Hanahaki Disease, a disease where the victim coughs up flower petals when suffering from one-sided love and can be cured only by returned feelings or death.

Upon reading that Yusaku blushed and let his chair slide backwards a bit, his green eyes looking at the screen almost tearing up. He got it now, this warm feeling he felt every single time he was to Ryoken... it was love. But realizing that didn't make things better. His chest started burning again, this time more flowers came out, more pressured was applied on his chest and throat... not only Yusaku knew that he loved Ryoken... he also knew, he was positive, that his feelings would always remain only his and shielded behind his lips. The thought of his whole situation brought tear to his eyes, not because his death was nearing, but because he wouldn't even have the chance to try to tell Ryoken that he loved him... he had no way of contacting him, was too prideful to ask Spectre for information... and he was sure that he never even deserved Ryoken.

* * *

Now his room looked like a little garden, a month passed since his cough started out, about a month and a half since Ai was defeated... since he last saw Ryoken sail away into the unknown. Two weeks passed since his feelings fully bloom, since Yusaku finally understood how much he loved and longed for Ryoken to be there, even with his sharp comments or teasing... or even when he was full with sarcasm, he wanted that voice to be near him, to feel the warmth that Ryoken's body usually emitted, a small little warm flame that you were drawn upon like a fly on a lamp, even if it was useless you were still attracted to that light. That was exactly how Yusaku felt, like Ryoken was the light that guided him through every single hardship in his poor life, the light of hope that gave him meaning and reason to continue chasing it. When he found it... what Yusaku truly wanted was Ryoken to have a future he deserved, if possible with him included... But those past days his mind was not so positive. 

His mind was filled with thoughts of self-loathing and regret.   
Why couldn't he save him like he wanted?  
Why couldn't he have said something sooner even with the fear of getting rejected?  
Why couldn't he know how he felt before?  
Why?

The all known feeling of coughing came to Yusaku again, just thinking of those two blue eyes staring at his from his daydreams caused such a reaction now. More flowers came out of his mouth into his palms this time. Softly he placed the flowers down together with the others, most of them were in little bags, others in bowls, others just scattered on the floor. Yusaku knew that he couldn't last very long, he didn't go to school even if classes started, he didn't even go to Kusanagi-san's truck to work from how much pain he was in, the burning and the feeling that something was crawling up his inside was higher today, reaching almost the back of his throat... 

He could ask Spectre for Ryoken's phone number, his fingers hovered on and about the keyboard every day for a long long time, trying to press the keys, type the message and send it, only for him to delete it right away. He could even ask Baira or Faust, those two have been worried for him, but Yusaku didn't know them well enough and didn't even know if their worry was genuine or just because Ryoken told them to. Also he was almost sure Kusanagi-san knew Ryoken's information, if not Kusanagi then Akira did. Nevertheless Yusaku would never ask the other boy's information anyways... the past days were hell for him... he had found the solid ground of him merely not being enough. Yes, Ryoken saved him... but that was it. Yes sure he gave him a very helpful card against Ai, the monster of the card being Borreload as well... but that was it. They were just comrades from time to time... Ryoken didn't have feelings for him, he should find someone better, someone stronger, someone who deserved him.

With those thoughts Yusaku started coughing up those flowers again, that assortment of purple, white and blue. This time he didn't have time to cover his mouth, the little flowers spurted everywhere on his face and chest, but he didn't care, he didn't seem shocked or scared at that moment, just happy, content if you may, that him, Fujiki Yusaku, was blessed to feel what love was and with an amazing man to top it all. Him not being brave enough to confess had nothing to do with it, he was merely happy to have known that feeling.

* * *

As the days passed no one heard from Yusaku, not even a vital sign that he was alive. Spectre was starting to get worried, Aoi too, she was always at Kusanagi's stand trying to spot Yusaku anywhere. Takeru learned the news from Aoi herself and he even started packing to go back to Den City in order to see what had happened to his best friend. Something told Spectre that things were more serious than any of them could imagine so he did what first came to mind, opened his messages on his phone and pressed the keys fast and with deep breaths.

_Spectre: 'Something is wrong with Fujiki...' _the other person at the end of the message did not delay to respond.

_Ryoken: 'What do you mean by something is wrong?! What happened?!'_

_Spectre: 'Nothing, we just haven't heard from him for the past days...'_

_Ryoken: 'When you say past days? When was the last time he had any contact with any of you?'_

_Spectre: 'Around four to five... Ryoken-sama wouldn't it be better if you-'_

_Ryoken: 'I am returning today, I will be there at about 6pm... Just wait for me at Kusanagi's stand... I will find you there.'_

_Spectre: 'As you wish... oh... Ryoken-sama?'_

_Ryoken: 'What is it Spectre?'_

_Spectre: 'Do you have flowers at the city you are now?'_

_Ryoken: 'Not time for that Spectre... See you soon...' _and with that the messages ended and Spectre pocketed his phone waiting for the 4 long hours to pass for his previously boss and friend to arrive, he was certain that if something was wrong with Fujiki... only Ryoken could handle it, better than anyone else, since whatever his friend said the younger boy took to heart dearly.

It wasn't long until those hours passed, Spectre helped around the hot dog stand with Aoi while Miyu and Jin were sitting watching a movie, relaxing after some psychotherapy sessions for Jin that occurred previously during the day, when they were ready to gather the tables that was when Spectre spotted him. Ryoken Kogami hadn't changed the past month, his figure still slim and slender, his clothes consisted of a black pair of jeans with white simple shoes and a light blue V-neck shirt accompanied with a frosty white jacket, it was his classic style just a bit altered in colors. Walking towards them with hands in his pockets Ryoken sighed and did a slight soft bow to all of them as a greeting. Miyu and Jin looked up and smiled a bit, Kusanagi from behind the counter waved with a slight 'Yo', Aoi herself just waved while Spectre approached him.

"Good to see you again, Ryoken-sama. As I mentioned... we are all worried about Fujiki-kun... we think he might have fallen sick having in mind him being absent from school for several weeks." started Spectre while looking at Ryoken dead in the eye "I think... and so does every single one of us, that it would be for the best if you went over to check up on him... After all you have the best impact on him." silently nodding at each other Ryoken smiled a bit.

"I will, do not worry about that..." he looked at the small crowd behind Spectre's shoulder "I will make sure he is okay..." and with that he left. He remembered where Yusaku lived, his memory was still fresh, although it would always be when it came to Yusaku. The memories of the rare smiles and those two green eyes never left him even in his short trip to find out his true self and goal, those two thoughts were what kept him going... those and so many more. He wanted to go up to Yusaku's place, call him by his name yet again, regret setting in not long after he first muttered it on how he should have said it sooner, said it more, Ryoken wanted to hug the other boy and whisper sweet nothings in his ear making sure he was okay or he was making him feel okay. Ryoken understood what he felt for Yusaku on that self-realization boat ride and he was pretty much determined to speak his mind now that he was back.

Finally reaching Yusaku's appartment, Ryoken held in his hands a bouquet of pure white roses as he knocked.   
No answer.  
He knocked again.  
Silence.  
Then he remembered that Yusaku tended to keep a secret key in a small hidden compartment next to the doorway, he had mentioned it in case something was urgent and he had gotten hurt or failed them. After his gentle fingers pressed some parts of the wall, a click was heard and the small drawer like secret door opened. Softly he grabbed the key before closing it again inside the wall, his hands were shaking a bit but soon he calmed them down, if Yusaku saw him he wanted to be calm, reserved and not shaking every few seconds. Twisting the key to the look let him step in the dark room.

"Yusaku?" he whispered in a low voice closing the door behind him with some creaking sounds. As he walked in pure darkness, clutching the flowers with one hand, he stepped on something, something plastic. Moving his finger to the wall he found the light switch and upon turning it on he saw that he stepped on a bag filled with little blue, purple and white hyacinth flowers. Ryoken didn't deny that they were beautiful but they were everywhere, in bags and even around the floor. "Yusaku what is all of thi-" his sentence was cut short when he saw the younger boy laying on his bed, curled up, his body facing the door, his eyes closed in a calm smiling expression while at the corner of his mouth was a string of some flowers.

Panicked, Ryoken let the arrangement of white roses fall to the ground accompanying the hyacinths while he ran to Yusaku's side. He clutched his palm in his, it was limp, cold... he was more pale than usual... Ryoken's eyes went wide when his fingers traveled up to his ex-rival's neck to see that they were not only no pulse but his whole throat was swollen. Softly out of curiosity as to why, with shaking hands he pressed on Yusaku's jaw and opened his lips, parting them only to see his mouth filled with different colors of hyacinth flowers and blood on their petals... like those scattered around the room. He knew about this, his father used to tell him the tale... he never thought of it to be true and surely never thought it would happen to the boy he truly held so dear to his heart. Closing Yusaku's mouth again, Ryoken softly placed his lips on top of his knuckles, bringing them close to him with his still panicked moves, he could feel tears running down his face... fear, sorrow and regret getting all over his body... He had no idea what to do but lay his head down on the bed mattress as his body curled up on the floor, his hand never leaving Yusaku's... his blue eyes just observing how many bloomed up flowers were around... how much blood accompanied their vibrant colors and how much pain Yusaku must have been going through while he was away. His heart was clenching in his chest and his mind cursing himself for being the cause of all the sorrow and the pain, cursing himself for being at fault... for being the creator of this scene... for being the reason the flowers bloomed in the first place...

**Author's Note:**

> Just a quick thingie~ Ryoken is not cursing himself because he knows that Yusaku is in love with him, he mainly does that cause he was away and couldn't help him overcome whatever he was passing through~!  
Hope you enjoyed this quick lil fic!  
Kudos, Comments and Bookmarks are always welcome!  
Thank you for reading~!


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